I got this light bulb moment this morning when saying my gratitude-prayer, a ritual that I do first thing after brushing my teeth and washing my face. I was giving thanks for my health, the abundance and bliss in my life, when all of a sudden I had some flashbacks of childhood memories. Memories of when everything was so perfect, smooth and effortless; memories of when I didn’t have to worry about what tomorrow brings, about failure, and about money.
Those were memories of when I was in grade school. All the way up until I was 11, I lived in a kind of bliss and success that is to die for in an adult’s standard. I was No. 1 in class every year, always the class leader and enjoyed immense popularity among my classmates. For these, I got the nickname of “Super Woman” in school. Not only did I do well in all subjects at school, I was also talented in art and in gymnastics. I was cute, active, playful and social.
Success, to me, was a given. I never had to worry about losing it or not living with it. I took it for granted. I even felt rich for the amount of money I saved in my piggy bank! In fact, my being No. 1 in class saved my parents my school tuitions for all those years. So my mom used to call me “Little Rich Lady.”
Because of the good start I had in my life, and the lack of failure or obstacles in those formative years, my world almost tumbled when my position in class fell to No. 2 and I started to get bitter and frustrated. I did make a come back the following term though and graduated with the top ranking in my class again.
Well, after that very first stumble, my life opened me up to a great many lessons of perseverance and resilience in the face of pain and hardship. However, what I want to focus on now, is that feeling of sailing on the waves of success, happiness and well-being. I was really lucky to have experienced that in my childhood. Somehow the feeling has been lost as I grew up, and unfortunately I spent too much time ruminating on the painful memories. And the more I did so, the more failures and heartbreaks I experienced. And the worse I felt, the more I tended to beat myself up–the vicious cycle continued.
Now I am going to make a U-turn and go back to those happy memories. I should not be afraid to embrace those feelings again, to feel that I am entitled to happiness and success again! As Louise Hay has said:
Dwelling on lack only creates more lack….. Gratitude thinking brings abundance.”
“If we want a joyous life, we must think joyous thoughts. Whatever we send out mentally or verbally will come back to us in like form.
By thinking and feeling the way I used to as a child–“invincible”–I am sure “miracles” will happen!
Let’s try this exercise and bring back those “perfect moments” in our lives, and breathe through them as if we were living those moments now.
P.S. Synchronicity–after publishing this entry and meditating, I picked up an Abraham card and it says:
As you focus on the best of what you do have, even if it is only a small part of your experience, the Law of Attraction will now bring you more of the essence of that. And so, you can replace a “downward spiral” with a fast-moving “upward spiral” by simply directing your thoughts more to things you do want.